


Just Be Mine

by Kca1516



Series: Wintersoldier Steve [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Bucky Barnes as Captain America, Fluff and Angst, Jealousy, Little bit of humor, M/M, Mutual Pining, Overprotective Steve, Steve Rogers & Bucky Barnes (friendship) - Freeform, Steve Rogers & Natasha (friendship), Steve Rogers Feels, Steve Rogers as the Winter Soldier, Steve thinks Rhodey wants Tony, Tony Stark & Rhodey (friendship), Tony Stark protection squad consists mainly of Steve
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-28
Updated: 2018-06-28
Packaged: 2019-05-30 01:14:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15085796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kca1516/pseuds/Kca1516
Summary: Wintersoldier Steve is jealous when he thinks Tony is in love with RhodesThe second chapter is the same oneshot as the first just from Tony’s pov (i have yet to finish it)Also this takes place before the first oneshot in this series





	Just Be Mine

**Author's Note:**

> This is officially the longest thing I have ever weitten and i am very much proud of it  
> Hope you enjoy our two bous being wonderful oblivious idiots

_ Steve hated James Rhodes. _

 

_ He didn’t mean to.  _

 

_ For Tony’s sake he wished he loved the guy.  _

_ But, he just...couldn’t. Ever since their first meeting Rhodes rubbed him the wrong way. He was always too polite, too considerate, and most importantly too close to Tony. _

_ From the second the man’s name had come out of the genius’s mouth, Steve knew everything was about to change. And, not for the better. _

 

~~~~~~~~~~

 

The super soldier was in Tony’s lab while the man tinkered away on his arm. There hadn’t been anything actually wrong with it, but if he told Stark that then the man would stop paying attention to him. Steve didn’t want Tony to stop paying attention to him. If he lied to make sure that never happened, well, he could live with that.

Besides Bucky, Tony was the only person Steve trusted.

From the first time the super soldier met the man, he was hooked. He had taken to the genius like glue, and didn’t plan to pry himself away any time soon.  

Steve had been getting checked over by SHIELD’s medical team when he first saw Tony.

It had been a memorable experience... 

 

_ The super soldier was strapped to a hospital bed as doctors checked him over. No one had bothered asking him if he would be ok with it. No one had bothered to talk to him instead of treating him like a caged animal in a zoo. They simply strapped him down and started proding.  _

_ Needless to say, Steve had not been too pleased.  _

_ As the doctors expected, the super soldier put up a fight. But, they hadn’t expected him to get creative. _

_ Honestly, what had they thought would happen? They had tied his arms down, goddamnit. _

 

_ ~~~~~~~~~~ _

 

Steve still smirked whenever he remembered the horror on the nurse’s face who was trying to check his eyes with a small light. The boy’s blood had tasted like copper when Steve’s teeth clenched down on his wrist. 

 

That’s when they had gagged him. 

 

~~~~~~~~~~

 

_ Steve had simply been toying with the medics up until that point.  _

_ He had been starting to remember who Bucky was at the time, and knew no one was intentionally going to hurt him. But, it was still far too easy for him to slip into the role of The Winter Soldier. _

_ The people who had been in the room that day quickly found that out. _

_ Bucky hadn’t been with him to stop the doctors from shoving the piece of leather into his mouth. Steve’s only ally had been talking to the man with the eyepatch, who Steve certainly did not trust. _

_ The super soldier wouldn’t be able to fight off all his handlers with the restraints still in place. That’s when he had started to panic. Brief flashes of Hydra agents and pain reeled through his mind, making him scream and thrash wildly, eyes clenched shut. The doctors had all backed up at the sudden outburst. But, Steve was powerless to stop himself. He was lost to the visions in his head. _

 

_ Until he wasn’t. _

 

_ “What the fuck is wrong with you people?” shouted an angry male voice. Steve immediately honed in on it trying to stay present, “Get the fuck away from him! Get out of the room! You’re lucky I'm not pressing charges. What kind of doctors are you? Gagging a trauma patient.” _

_ Somewhere in Steve’s head he realized the man, whoever he was, was trying to protect him. Steve watched as the team of doctors ran from the room until the super soldier was alone with the unknown brunette. And, then there was only one thought in Steve’s head. The man was beautiful. _

_ Oh, don’t get him wrong the man was pissed, but he was beautiful. His hair was disheveled and messy, there were bags under his eyes and he was wearing a shirt with strange symbols on it Steve didn’t understand in the slightest. The man he would later know as Tony Stark took the gag out of his mouth, and undid his straps. _

 

_ Steve had been fixated from there on out… _

 

Which led him back to Tony’s workshop in Avengers Tower.

Steve now recognized the shirts Tony wore as band t-shirts. Though he still found them strange, it was a comfortable, familiar sight he had become addicted to. 

The super soldier wasn’t ashamed to say he was comforted by Tony. When Steve had first arrived at the tower, he had followed the man around like a lost puppy. Wherever Tony was, Steve was close by. That was until Bucky had compared him to a duckling who had imprinted on its mother. Shame crept up on Steve. He didn’t want to become a burden to his new friend. The super soldier vowed to distance himself after that.

Spending only a little time with Tony was better than no time.

(Though he hoped he wasn’t exaggerating when he said Tony may have looked a tad put out at the change)

Steve had decided to give Tony space, but that didn’t stop him from being overprotective of the genius. The super soldier had taken it upon himself to be Tony’s personal bodyguard. The man was oh so small (Tony would kill him for saying that) and seemingly defenseless, especially without his suit.

Steve worried about the man, constantly. What if something happened to the genius and Steve wasn’t there to protect him?

These feelings were a new experience for Steve. If he went a little overboard with looking out for Tony, he could chalk it up to the past seventy years. 

Which was why, for the fifth time that week, Steve had made his way down to the lab to be with the genius.

(Shut up, Bucky. No he was not worrying too much he was worrying the perfect amount, thank you.)

Tony had a small frown on his face that Steve wanted smooth away with the pad of his thumb as the man closed up the super soldier's arm. Tony was the only one allowed to touch it, not even Bucky got that privilege.

“I’m sorry Steve. I can’t figure out what's bothering you so much. Everything seems to be working fine. I’ll stay up tonight and look at the data again, see if I can find what's causing such an issue,” Tony said as he reached for his fifth? Sixth? Coffee of the night. Steve inwardly cringed. He had only wanted to spend time with Tony. He hadn’t wanted for Tony to work himself to the bone for a problem that didn’t exist. The genius got too little sleep as it was. Tony always brushed off Steve’s ‘mother henning’, but Steve knew his sleeping patterns were worse than the super soldier's own.

 

He had to fix this.

 

“No. It feels fine,” Steve grunted, putting in a over exaggerated shoulder roll for good measure. Steve looked up at Tony, who was still standing in the v of his legs, with puppy eyes he knew the genius couldn’t resist. 

But, Tony only looked at him questioningly, and placed a hand on the metal bicep. Steve struggled not to shiver. Whenever anyone so much as brushed it, the man would flinch away. The contact would inevitably trigger bad memories.

But, never with Tony. With Tony, Steve sank into the pressure, finding reassurance in the touch.

 

“Just a second ago you were complaining pretty vocally about it, big guy-”

 

Steve shook his head, “You must have done something since then to make it feel better, vozlyublennaya.” 

The supersoldier insisted. He often found himself calling Tony pet names in Russian, grateful for the fact that Tony didn’t speak the language. If Natasha gave him knowing looks once in a while, worse things had happened.

 

“But, I didn’t even touch anything-” Tony started to say, confused, and moved from in between Steve’s legs. A fierce urge of possessiveness shocked the super soldier.

 

“No!” Steve cried, grabbing Tony around the waist and pulling him back. The genius stumbled for a moment before regaining his balance, now even closer to Steve then he had been before. It was a testament to how much time the two spent together that instead of bolting like any sane person would, Tony smiled fondly down at Steve and started petting his hair.

 

“What's wrong, Steve? And, don’t lie to me. If your arm’s hurt I need to know so I can help you. We’ve talked about this.”

Steve leaned into the hand that was stroking his hair, getting lost in the feeling of calloused fingers massaging his scalp. The super soldier pressed his own hands a little harder into Tony’s skin, feeling the muscles in his back through the thin t-shirt. It was a tad ironic that Tony didn’t want him to pretend he wasn’t in pain, when in reality it was the opposite.

“Don’t worry about my arm, kotenok,” Steve said finally looking into Tony’s warm brown eyes, “you would be making me feel much better by getting rest instead.”

Tony threw his head back to laugh. Steve scowled.

“This again, huh, big guy?” Tony asked, a smile on his face, “don’t worry for my sake, Rogers. I sleep enough to get by. There are more important things to cry over then my sleeping habits.”

The frown on Steve’s face deepened, while Tony’s smile only grew. It baffled the super soldier to see how low self esteem Tony really had. Oh, he hid it well, but Steve was a trained spy. He could see through the masks Tony wore. It hurt Steve to know how little the genius thought of himself. He wished the other man could see through Steve’s eyes. Then he would know.

“I’m always going to worry about you,” Steve murmured, catching Tony’s attention.

The man’s carefree smile slipped from his face, sensing the time for laughter had ended.

The genius blinked his big, brown eyes like an owl, trying to comput what Steve had said. 

A hungry need shot through the super soldier. A need to show Tony just how amazing Steve thought he was, how worthy he was. Steve reached for the hand that wasn’t petting his hair, and stroked the back of it with his thumb. Very slowly, giving Tony time to pull away, Steve brought the hand up to his mouth. When Tony didn’t tug out of his grip, Steve placed a light kiss on the back of his hand.

Unlike the pads of Tony’s fingers that were covered in hard skin, the back of his hands were soft and smooth. It reminded Steve a little of Tony’s personality. Rough at first, but then so...delicate.

Steve maintained eye contact throughout the entire kiss. Noticing with a pleased hum how Tony’s cheeks were stained a dark red and his eyes were blown wide. 

But, just as soon as it started, the moment ended.

Tony pulled back suddenly, stepping away from Steve completely. The genius coughed awkwardly and started cleaning up the tools he had used to open Steve’s arm. The supersoldier smirked. Normal people would have taken Tony's reaction poorly. But, Steve didn’t miss the way his lips were pulled up in a small smile or how he tried, not so subtly, to adjust his pants.

“Rhodey’s coming,” Tony blurted as he dropped a wrench for a second time and had to bend down to pick it back up. Steve didn’t mind, the way the genius’s pants hugged his ass was a crime in itself.

 

“What’s a Rhodey?” Steve asked offhandedly, his eyes never leaving Tony’s form as he flitted around the workshop. Tony stopped for a moment, his arms full of tools, his eyes meeting Steve’s for the first time since the kiss.

 

“I forgot,” Tony seemed to say to himself, “the last time Rhodey was here was before you arrived.” 

Steve raised his eyebrow when Tony took too long to continue with his explanation.

 

“Lieutenant Colonel James Rupert Rhodes, or as I call him my better half. We were friends in college, he’s saved my ass countless times. I made him an Iron Man suit, and he’s my best friend. He’s coming to stay for a week or two, depending. You’ll meet him. You’ll like him, too. Everybody does. He’s better than I am,” Tony said as he finally finished picking up around the workshop. Steve’s pleased glow died within the second. He was silent, processing all the information Tony just told him. 

Something about the way Tony spoke about this Rhodes guy made his gut twist unpleasantly.

 

“Anywho,” Tony said after waiting for a reply that would never come, “I’m off to bed-hey just like you wanted- you can find your own way out. Um, night Steve.”

With that Tony fled the room, leaving the super soldier to think on this new comer and what it meant for Tony.

 

What it meant for himself.

  
  


~~~~~~~~~~

 

_ The memory had only been the start of Rhodes and Steve’s rivalry.  _

 

_ Though he hadn't known it yet. _

 

~~~~~~~~~~

 

After the talk in Tony’s workshop, Steve had lay awake in bed, staring at the ceiling. He couldn’t help but prepare himself for the worst. Tony seemed to trust this Lieutenant guy, but what if he was wrong? Steve had read Tony’s file more then once. 

 

(Without anyone knowing of course)

Needless to say, the genius’s track record wasn’t the best.

Tony had blindly trusted people like Howard Stark and Obadiah Stane his entire life. What if Rhodes turned out to be the same? What if Rhodes was only using Tony for the suit? Information the genius, himself, had willingly given Steve. 

What if Rhodes only wanted to get close to Tony to hurt him, or steal from him? What kind of guy was Rhodes really?

Steve couldn’t rest until he had answers. So he did the one thing he always did when he had questions.

He went to Bucky.

Normally, Tony would be on that list as well, but Steve couldn’t go to him for obvious reasons. So, Steve shucked off the covers and stealthily made his way to Barnes’s quarters. Without a sound, Steve crept down the hall into the other man’s room. He opened and closed the door without ever making a sound.

 

Bucky’s room was simple. There were hardly any possessions lying around, except his shield, and he slept very neatly in the middle of the bed with his hands folded over his stomach. As he had in his army days.

Without any thought to his friend’s rest, Steve climbed onto the bed and started poking at Bucky’s arm.

 

“Barnes,” he insisted, “Bucky, wake up. I need to ask you something.”

Bucky’s eyes shot open in surprise, a gasp on his lips as he sat up in bed. Clearly distraught. Whoops.

 

“Barnes...you with me?” Steve asked hesitantly. He didn’t think Bucky would attack for waking him, but he could never be too careful. Bucky put a hand on his chest, as if to make sure his heart was still beating, and looked over at Steve with a crude smile on his lips.

 

“Damn you Rogers,” he said lightly so Steve wouldn’t take it the wrong way. Immediately, the super soldier relaxed. He fell onto the bed next to Bucky, looking akin to a puppy.

 

“What do you need that’s so important you had to wake me up at,” Bucky glanced over at his bedside clock, “three in the morning?”

Steve wasted no time in asking the question that had plagued his mind the entire night.

 

“I was talking to Tony.”

 

“As usual,” Bucky said, smirking. Steve punched him in the arm, going for casual but not quite managing it when Bucky flinched. Steve smirked, Bucky rolled his eyes.

 

“Get on with it you menace,” the brunette said fondly while rubbing his arm.

 

Steve brought his legs up so his chin could rest on his knees before continuing.

 

“Tony said something about a friend coming to stay for a while...a James Rhodes.”

Bucky waited patiently while Steve organized his thoughts enough to articulate exactly what he wanted to say.

 

“Is he...is he safe? For Tony?” 

Bucky’s eyes went wide with disbelief before he started laughing. Steve immediately frowned, annoyed by the reaction.

 

“I mean it Barnes,” Steve insisted, “Tony’s safety isn’t a laughing matter.”

His statement only caused Bucky to shake harder. Steve went beet red, not enjoying being cause for such rambunctious laughter. When the taunting became too much, Steve pounced. He rolled the unsuspecting Bucky off the bed and onto the floor until he had him pinned underfoot.

Bucky stopped laughing the moment his back hit the wood paneling due to the wind getting knocked out of him. Steve wasn’t too worried, they both had the same serum running through their veins.

 

“I’m serious, Bucky,” Steve growled looking down angrily at his friend. Bucky had never before laughed at him for asking a question. He found he didn’t like it. Steve quickly got off Barnes and, with a huff, made to storm out of the room. But, before he got far Bucky grabbed his ankle and tugged. 

Steve crashed to the floor, scrambling to a position where he could protect himself if Bucky tried to attack. Immediately, Barnes’s hands were raised in a show of peace.

“Calm down there, Stevie. It’s just me. I’m not going to hurt you, you know that. I was just playing around,” Bucky soothed, smiling when Steve relaxed slightly and moved a little closer to his friend. Slowly but surely the two situated themselves to sit next to each other, their backs supported by the bed. For a long time there was silence, though it wasn’t as tense as Steve would have expected. In fact, the longer it continued the more comfortable it became.

 

“Leave it to you to worry about Tony Stark’s safety around the man who took care of him for all of his adult life,” Bucky finally said, fondly.

Steve stared at him, not needing to speak for Bucky to know he wanted more of an explanation.

 

“From what I’ve heard, Rhodey practically took care of Tony during their time in college together. Afterwards, too. Without him, Tony would have crashed and burned a long time ago. Plus, I’ve met the guy. You don’t need to worry Stevie, your genius is safe with him. If there’s anyone, besides you, I’d trust Tony Stark’s safety with it's James Rhodes.”

Steve nodded his head, and the room was plunged into compatible silence once again. Bucky eventually climbed back into bed when he realized Steve was done talking for the night, and within the next five minutes was asleep if his snoring was anything to go by. Steve stayed a little longer, sitting at the side of the bed to sort through his thoughts.

Bucky trusted this Rhodes character, that meant something at least. But, the situation still felt wrong to the super soldier. He still didn’t like the way Tony seemed to trust him blindly and spoke so fondly of him. With Bucky’s approval, Steve no longer felt the need to gut the guy as soon as he walked through the door. But, he sure as hell wasn’t letting Tony out of his sight the entire duration of the Lieutenant’s stay. Tony wasn’t getting hurt, not on his watch.

With that in mind, Steve got up from his spot on the floor prepared to get a few more hours of sleep before morning came. He padded silently across the room, but looked back at the sleeping form of Bucky before he left.

His friend was wrong. The only other person, besides himself, that he would trust with Tony Stark’s safety was Bucky Barnes.

  
  


~~~~~~~~~~

  
  


Steve had been sitting on the couch, watching whatever was on TV with the rest of the Avengers, when it happened.

The elevator dinged, and who he suspected was Lieutenant Colonel James Rhodes stepped out.

 

Steve’s mood immediately dampened. 

 

The super soldier would admit the man was...impressive. Not as impressive as him of course, but there was a sense of power to him. Rhodes was tall with kind eyes, and well muscled arms. He smiled charmingly, and Steve could see why everyone seemed to like him. But, he wasn't convinced. 

From against Steve’s right side, where he had been resting so nicely, Tony jumped up from the couch. The genius sprinted over to the other man, and leapt into his arms. Steve grumbled his annoyance. No one paid him any mind.

Rhodes groaned under the sudden weight, but hugged Tony back just as tightly. Already, Steve was trying his hardest not to go over and rip Tony from the man’s arms.

_ He’s not safe for you _ , the super soldier wanted to scream at Tony, but let it be. Bucky had said the man was trustworthy, time would tell if that trust was well placed.

 

“Someone’s been feeding you,” Rhodes commented to the smiling genius as he put Tony back on the floor. 

A spark of rage lit in Steve’s gut. How dare he comment on Tony’s body. Steve worked so hard to get him to eat semi regular meals throughout the day and the genius was slowly but surely making it to a healthy weight. If Rhodes hinged that process in the slightest Steve would wring his neck.

 

“I’ll have to thank whoever that is,” Rhodey continued, a pleased twinkle in his eye as he looked at Tony.

 

Steve crossed his arms, reeling back the monster that resided in him. It was fine. He felt confident that Rhodes would mess up, and when he did that monster would be ready. 

From the corner of his eye the super soldier noticed Bucky watching him, concerned. Steve glared at his friend, he didn’t need a babysitter. 

 

“That would be Steve,” Tony said with a blush. The entire team stopped watching their TV show to stare at the man who tried not to flush. Even though they were attempting to give Rhodey and Tony privacy before bombarding the guest, that didn’t stop them from listening in on the conversation as Steve had. 

Steve didn’t make eye contact with any of his teammates. Choosing instead to focus on the screen in front of him. He hadn’t exactly made it a secret that it was him feeding their resident genius, but he hadn’t publicized the information either.

“Oh, yes your famous Winter Soldier,” Rhodes said, Steve tensed, not sure if he liked the sound of that name falling from the Lieutenant’s mouth. He monitored Rhodes and Tony as they moved to the rest of the group. Feeling an abrupt anger spark inside him. Tony was resting under the Lieutenant’s arm looking by all means like he belonged there. Like Tony belonged to Rhodes.

Bull fucking shit.

No way in hell was Steve going to stand for that. Tony was his...right? The super soldier's anger died a little when he realized he didn’t know the answer to the question. Steve protected Tony, Tony protected Steve. That had to mean something. And, last night the kiss in workshop. Sure it hadn’t been a proper kiss, but it was a brand nonetheless. Tony was his.

 

“Maybe not  _ my _ Winter Soldier- oh shut up James come meet him he’s over here-”

 

Steve cut Tony off, the words flying from his mouth before he could stop them.

 

“Believe it or not I can introduce myself, kitten,” Steve said, using the nickname he normally only spoke in Russian. He decided he liked the reaction he got when in English even better. Tony went red as a tomato and what could only be described as a giddy smile spread across his face. 

Steve had never used a Russian nickname in English before and delighted in how it made Tony squirm. Take that Rhodes. There was no way in hell he was going to let the Lieutenant take Tony. He was going to put up a fight.

Steve stood from the sofa, looking Rhodes in the eyes for the first time. The super soldier subtly tried to puff his chest out, and glared wickedly down at him. Lesser men had run away screaming from the sight he caused. Not Rhodes. He picked up on the dominant stance immediately, and reacted accordingly. The bastard slid his arm around Tony’s waist in a not so subtle gesture for Steve to back off. Like hell was that happening. If Rhodes wanted to play, he’d play.

Steve thrust out his metal arm, the tension in the air was palpable.

The room full of Avengers behind him went completely silent. This was absolutely out of character for the super soldier who usually stayed as far away from visitors as possible. He never made out right contact or so obviously picked a fight. He certainly never let them anywhere near is metal arm.

Rhodes looked at the hand then smirked, and reached his own out. Steve raised an eyebrow. He couldn’t deny he was impressed that the man didn’t blink an eye at the prosthetic.

The two men shook hands curtly, and Steve tried his hardest to crush Rhodes fingers in his own. The bastard didn’t even flinch.

 

“Ok, that’s enough, big guy,” Tony said soothingly to Steve, sensing the tension. He moved from Rhodes side to Steve’s, making the man preen inwardly. Steve let go of Rhodes hand, and turned to the genius. He ran a hand up his fella’s arm. Tony only stroked his ego when he leaned into the touch. 

 

“You ok, Steve?” Tony asked, softly. He was trying to keep the question from reaching prying ears, though they both knew it was pointless. Steve took a moment to assess his feelings before answering. He wanted to be as honest as possible. That’s what Bucky told him to do. 

He realized the rage monster that had been bottled up inside him had eased with Tony at Steve’s side instead of the Lieutenants. 

 

“Fine,” the super soldier murmured, back to his quiet secluded self. Tony still had a hint of worry in his eyes, but moved away from the blond. Steve kind of hated that he did that. What he hated more was when Tony went back to Rhodes and linked arms with the man.

 

“Well, that was eventful,” Tony said trying to ease the obvious strain, “everyone loves a bit of testosterone in a room. Now if you’ll excuse us, honey bear and I have some catching up to do-”

 

“I’m going, too,” Steve said, forcefully. Once again grabbing everyone’s attention. Tony stood frozen, half facing Steve half facing an exit. Rhodes’s eyes were wide at Steve’s statement and he glanced at the genius, a knowing look on his face. Steve hated it. He hated feeling inferior to the man who had known Tony for years. Who could share a glance with the man and know exactly what the other was trying to convey.

 

Rhodes was cunning. It was clear to Steve who had studied human habits and patterns for years, and he refused to leave Tony in the same room with the man.

 

“Steve…” Tony pleaded, a pained expression on his face, “I need to… talk to James here...” he said looking at Rhodey for backup. Though Rhodes looked at him with a smile as if to say how the hell are you going to dig yourself out of this one. 

 

“Alone,” Tony finished, expression guilty. Steve felt like the wind had gotten knocked out of him. Tony didn’t want him around. For the first time since knowing the man, Tony was sending him away. He didn’t like it. He really didn’t like it. It felt like he was being replaced. Now that Rhodes was here, Steve wasn’t worth Tony’s time. Steve stepped away. He wasn’t tapping out, not yet, but for Tony he would back off for now. Seeing as that was what the genius wanted.

 

“Fine,” Steve managed to spit out, keeping his voice intentionally neutral. Tony’s expression crumpled and he reached out to put a soothing had on Steve’s shoulder, but Steve moved away. Too many firsts were happening that day.

Tony inhaled sharply, trying hard not to let the hurt on his face show.

 

“Alright,” he said to himself before looking back at Steve, “I’ll see you later big guy.” 

The reply almost gave Steve hope, but then Tony walked to where Rhodes stood and easily accepted the arm that wrapped around his waist. Steve didn’t have much hope after that.

It was more like anger. For the first time since he had gotten to the tower, Steve was overcome with rage. It wasn’t an uncontrollable anger, he wasn’t in danger of becoming the soldier, but it was intense. Steve stood where he was. Watching Tony and Rhodes until he couldn’t anymore without moving.

He clenched his fists, confused and angry, and didn’t have the restraint in place not to slam his fist in the wall. He pulled his hand away to see a dent in the plaster, and hoped Tony wasn't too mad at him for it. It seemed to dawn on him that the rest of the Avengers were sitting on the couch still, watching his break down. Steve hunched his shoulders in embarrassment, hating Rhodes even more for making him lose control so easily. 

 

“Steve…” Bucky murmured calmly, halfway to a standing position in case Steve got violent. Steve wanted to roll his eyes. He knew his best friend was trying to look out for him, but he wasn’t an uncontrollable killing machine. At least, not anymore. The only person who seemed to understand that was Tony.

 

“I’m going to the gym,” Steve growled, storming out of the room.

 

Bucky rubbed his face with his hand, plopping back on the couch next to Clint.

 

“I can safely say I have never seen someone so whipped in my entire life,” the archer said matter of factly. Bucky couldn’t help but agree.

  
  


~~~~~~~~~~

  
  


Steve wasn’t holding back today.

Normally, he was conscious of how hard he worked the boxing equipment if only so Tony didn’t have to spend time making more when he inevitably broke them. Today was an excepcion. He hadn’t bothered to wrap his knuckles before starting and was furiously wailing on his fifth punching bag. The harsh leather burned against his torn up knuckles, but somehow the pain was almost comforting. At least it was familiar.

Pain he knew how to handle. James Rhodes on the other hand…

Steve audibly growled, using all his strength to hit the bag as hard as he could. He felt a small sense of satisfaction when the punch sent it flying off the chain to the other side of the room in shreds. Make that six. The super soldier was breathing heavy as he went to pick up another target. But, it wasn’t enough. Steve was still encompassed in his rage.

Rhodes was dangerous. He was a sly, cunning bastard who thought it was ok to wrap an arm around Stark’s back. Who didn’t flinch at Steve’s intimidation methods. Who had everyone fooled with his disarming, charismatic smile. Steve knew better. He saw through the lie even if no one else could. He’d have to be on his guard if only for Tony’s sake.

Stupid, stupid Tony who…

Who wasn’t letting Steve do his job.

Steve was supposed to protect Tony, but Tony wasn’t letting him. He hadn’t let Steve join him and Rhodey, and for all the super soldier knew Rhodes could be tricking him right now. He could be hurting Tony right now. A cold shiver made its way down Steve’s spine.

The mental image of Tony lying in a pool of his own blood as Rhodes laughed maniacally haunted him. Steve dropped the punching bag unceremoniously to the floor, already heading for the exit. He had to at least check on Tony, he just had to see for himself that his genius wasn’t hurt.

 

_ And then never let him near Rhodes again _ , said a determined voice in Steve’s head. The super soldier couldn't help but agree.

But, before Steve reached the exit, a certain flame haired female fell on all fours in front of him. Steve halted where he stood, his hackles raised. Normally, he always knew where Widow was. The fact that she had surprised him put him on edge. The super soldier trusted the spy in battle, but a spy was still a spy. He wasn’t dumb enough to let his entire guard down. 

 

“Where were you?” Steve asked in Russian. He’d make sure to check the hiding space next time. Widow watched him carefully for a moment before coming to stand on two feet, silently. Deadly, Steve’s brain supplied.

Without a word Widow lifted her chin to indicate a spot behind him. Carefully, to make sure she didn’t ambush him, the super soldier looked to where she had pointed. Seeing the platforms Tony had made for Hawkeye. They were all over the walls so Clint could shoot from all vantage points. Figures that Widow would use them to watch him.

 

“How long were you watching me?” He asked, a hint of skepticism making its way into his voice. Widow scowled.

 

“Enough, Steve,” she said, speaking in English. The super soldier tilted his head curiously, “no more Russian. I will not speak to you in that language while you still associate it with murder. I’m not going to hurt you. We’re teammates. I don’t expect you to trust me right away, but I’m taking the first step in mending that.” 

Determination shone brightly in her eyes, a hard set look to her features.

 

“You and I need to talk,” she said again, and plopped herself on the ground. She looked at him expectantly, waiting for him to make the next move. The super soldier eyed her warily. But, even knowing she was a master in lies, he could tell she was speaking the truth. Steve walked over to her and gingerly lowered himself to the ground.

 

“What is it you want to talk about?” Steve asked in flawless English. A hopeful tilt of Natasha’s lips was enough for him to know he had made the right decision. But, it died quickly as the atmosphere took a serious turn. Steve tensed, as if expecting a physical blow.

 

“What happened with Tony and Rhodes back there, Steve?” she asked.

By the sound of it, she already knew the answer and was waiting for Steve to catch on.

As expected, the super soldier was off the ground in the second walking away from her. Anger he had momentarily forgotten hit him full force once again. Natasha was not pleased.

The Russian leapt off the ground. Before Steve even had a chance to defend himself, the super soldier found himself on his back. Widow’s face smiling smugly above him. She had grabbed his hand and flipped him so he was flat on the ground. Natasha let go of his arm quickly, and Steve knew she wasn’t actually trying to harm him as much as get his attention. She stood above him, lax, with her hands on her hips.

Wrong move.

Steve grabbed at her ankle and pulled her so she fell to the ground besides him. It was the same move Bucky had used on him last night. To his surprise there was a smile on her face when she landed on her back, as if she found this all rather amusing. What surprised him further was the matching grin on his lips.

 

“Tell me, Steve, what happened back there,” Natasha encouraged again, after laying on the floor in comfortable silence for far longer than was socially acceptable. Steve tensed again, but stayed where he was this time. Knowing the Widow would simply pin him down again and again until he talked. Yet, it didn’t keep the bitterness out of his voice.

 

“You tell me,” he spat. They both knew the harshness wasn't aimed at her but at himself. A small frown sat on Natasha’s face as she moved to a sitting position.

 

“I know that you feel the need to protect Tony,” she said, Steve clenched his fists but let her continue, “I know that you don’t trust Rhodes, and I even know how you’re feeling.”

That’s where Steve cut in.

 

“Don’t presume to explain to me how I feel Natasha. Don't think you know what this is like.”

Nat simply rolled her eyes, and slapped him on the back of the head.

 

“Then don’t jump to conclusions, idiot.” Steve closed his mouth, feeling properly chastised.

 

“Don’t interrupt, just listen,” Natasha murmured, starting to run her hands through his hair soothingly. The motion reminded him almost painfully of Tony, and he easily sunk into it.

 

“Out of everyone in this tower, I can understand your situation the most because I went through something almost identical,” Steve looked up at her, feeling concern at the way her eyes seemed to glaze over as she remembered a part of her past she rarely talked about. But, as she had asked of him, Steve stayed silent.

 

“I remember feeling so..so lost when I first was brought to SHIELD. Everything I had been raised to believe, to do, was no longer expected of me. I felt like I didn’t have a purpose any more. I probably would have abandoned Fury and the rest of them if it wasn’t for one person..” she took a breath, seeming to prepare for something she had never told anyone before.

 

“Clint,” the redhead said, Steve stared at her waiting patiently for her to continue.

 

“He was the one who found me in the first place, who decided I was worth saving, and I latched on. He was my new purpose. I had to protect him, seeing as the idiot didn’t seem to be able to do it himself,” Natasha smiled lost in her memories. She didn’t even realize what she was saying. Steve wondered how much recovery she had gone through to get to that stage.

 

“I’m more then positive some of the shit he did was for my benefit only. That he’d get himself hurt solely so I’d feel useful either cleaning him up afterward or killing the bastard who had hurt him in the first place. He was like the younger sibling I never had, and I remember a time when I was extremely protective of him…” she said with a pointed look at the super soldier. He saw where this was going. Steve furrowed his eyebrows, something he had learned from Bucky meant he was not too pleased. Natasha ignored the look, and continued her story.

 

“It wasn’t just on missions, or during work hours. It would be during his home life, too. Back in the beginning we lived together. SHIELD told Clint to keep an eye on me because he was the only one who wasn’t terrified to do so. For a while it was fine. He was so preoccupied with me, it wasn’t like he was going out every night. But, eventually he started bringing people in to meet me, to help me integrate myself back into society. Let’s just say those nights never went well. But, it was always fine. Clint always forgave me for whatever I did in the name of protecting him. Until Laura.”

Steve felt a cold pit in his stomach, not liking these turn of events at all. Hating how it sounded eerily similar to his own life in the twenty first century thus far.

“Laura is now his wife, at the time she was his girlfriend. Every time he’d bring her over, I’d terrify her. There was a dark part in me that wanted Clint to myself, always. I needed to protect him from anything potentially harmful, I was becoming obsessed with it. He kept bringing Laura over again and again, trying to get me used to her. At the time he wanted the two most important people in his life to get along. But, I was dragging my heels through every part of it until one day he was done. We had a huge fight, and he walked out.”

There was a haunted look in her eyes, and Steve felt something he had never before for the Widow. Sympathy.

 

“That’s what it took for me to change. I couldn’t lose him, he was my family. I sucked up my pride and stepped back. I let him have people over, I met Laura properly, and now I’m the godmother to their kids.”

An irrational anger blindsided Steve, a complete one eighty from a moment before. Sometimes he didn’t feel emotions at all. Other times, they all liked to rush him at once.

“What are you trying to say?” he snapped, standing up from the floor to pace, “that I should leave Tony alone? Because that’s not happening-”

Natasha was standing too now, a tension in her stance, “I’m saying you might want to reevaluate your actions towards him before he walks away.”

That shut Steve up. He took a sharp intake of breath trying to hide his hurt. Tony would never walk away. He wouldn’t leave Steve... right?

“I’ve seen it happen Steve. It starts off fine, where the most your actions do is worry the other person. But, then you start to suffocate them until they snap. And then they walk away.”

Steve backed away from her, wondering why he had ever let his guard down in the first place. He had trusted her for a moment, and she had ripped the floor out from under him.

“Steve…” she said sympathetically, reaching a hand to him, but he flinched away and she pulled back. Guilt and sorrow flashed briefly across her face.

 

“Go away,” he muttered in Russian, his voice ice cold. Natasha nodded, not one to push boundaries. 

 

“Think about what I told you,” The Widow said before turning from him, “You have to give him space Steve or he’ll go out of his mind.”

 

“No,” the super soldier roared at her, “You know nothing. Tony won’t leave me. This is nothing like you and the archer.”

Natasha sighed, “You’re right, this isn’t exactly like me and Clint. I was never in love with him.” Steve froze.

 

She walked away, silently.

 

Deadly, his brain supplied.

  
  


~~~~~~~~~~

  
  


Steve was not in love with Tony.

The thought was preposterous. For once, Widow was wrong. Had to be wrong. Steve wasn’t in love, he just had strong feelings. Look, Tony was his. It was clear to the super soldier from the moment he met him. It was just as much a fact as the sky was blue, the grass was green, and Tony Stark belonged to Steve Rogers. That’s just how it was. It didn't mean Steve was head over heels in love with him.

Infatuated maybe, but who wouldn’t be. Tony Stark was gorgeous, he was sex personified. With his tousled hair and his dark brown eyes, and his ass. Steve could write sonnets about his ass. Or the way the genius would get lost in a project for hours and hours mumbling to himself until Steve would wrap an arm around his waist and pull him away from what he was working on.

 

Most of all Tony was his. He had a right to protect him. Especially from people named James Rhodes.

 

It was the morning after Steve had talked to Natasha, he was laying on the communal couch where he had been for the past five hours. He had barely slept a wink and the past two sleepless nights were starting to weigh on him. But, everytime his eyes closed, his mind turned on.

He saw Tony, yelling at him. Screaming at Steve to leave, to go away. How he wasn’t wanted anymore.

 

“Of course,” Steve would always say, “If that’s what you want, of course I’ll go.”

 

And, he’d walk away to the sound of Tony, and Bucky, and Natasha, and Rhodes laughing at him. He didn’t mind. As long as Tony was happier with him gone, he’d never come back.

But, as he would walk away from the one place he called home, the scenery around him would change. No longer were there large buildings and busy streets, but cold irons strapping him to a chair and pain.

 

Steve would wake up in a cold sweat.

 

He wanted to go to Tony and have the genius wrap him up in his arms like they usually did. But, he was afraid he would find Rhodes had already taken his spot.

So, halfway through the night he had moved from his bed to the couch in hopes the uncomfortable leather would keep him awake. Now it was five in the morning, and his eyes were bloodshot. But, at least there hadn’t been another nightmare.

Just before Steve was about to sit up to get ready for the day, the padding of familiar footsteps reached his ears. The super soldier flopped back down in hopes the man wouldn’t notice.

Tony never got up this early, what was he doing? Steve didn’t want to be seen like this. It was pathetic and he hadn’t had enough time to get his emotions back in check. The super soldier clutched the pillow he had been using, tearing it up with his metal hand, and hoped Tony’s lack of caffeine worked in his favor.

 

But, when had he ever been lucky.

 

“Steve? What are you doing on the couch?” Came Tony’s tired voice from behind him. Steve quickly let go of the ruined pillow and chanced a look up at the genius. 

 

His heart melted.

 

The man’s feathery hair was sticking up in all directions and his eyes were still half closed. He looked so...soft. Steve wanted to hold him close to his chest and protect him from a world that didn’t deserve him. Not that he was in love with Tony or anything. That would be absurd.

Tony yawned and Steve’s brain went offline. Ok so maybe he had some thinking to do on the subject.

 

“Hey, Steve...What’s wrong with you?” Tony asked, even in his sleepy state the man was a genius and wouldn’t look over Steve’s obvious distress.

Before Steve even had a chance to reply, Tony flopped himself over the back of the couch and onto Steve’s chest, planting his full weight on the super soldier so he wouldn’t escape the interrogation. Steve could easily lift the man off of him if he wanted to, but where was the fun in that. 

 

“You’re eyes are all puffy, and red. You look like you do when you haven’t slept,” Tony’s eyes perked open, “Steve have you not been sleeping-”

 

Steve pushed forward until his nose was touching Tony’s own, effectively cutting off the tired genius’s rambling. The super soldier smiled when Tony turned all shades of pink.

 

“It’s too early in the morning for this,” Tony mumbled to himself, though there was a smile on his face.

Already Steve felt the weight of his worries melt away with Tony’s presence. He wished they could stay like this forever without the rest of the world interfering.

 

“But, you’re not getting out of this conversation, Steve. What’s wrong? Is your bed-”

 

“There’s nothing wrong with the bed,” Steve insisted before Tony started getting ideas. He knew the genius’s way of showing affection was by suffocating people with gifts, but sometimes it was too much for Steve to handle. His bed was fine, his mind on the other hand was a whole different story.

But, Steve could read the rejection on Tony’s face loud and clear as the genius built up his walls, and started to pull away from Steve’s embrace. The super soldier couldn’t have that.

 

“Stop leaving me sweetheart,” he murmured and wrapped his arms around Tony’s neck so he could pull him back down. Once again the other man was covering Steve like a blanket.

 

“That’s better,” the super soldier smiled into Tony’s temple and breathed in his product free hair, nuzzling his face into it.

 

“Tell me what’s on your mind, big guy,” Tony said into Steve’s chest, using him as a human pillow.

 

“It’s not a big deal,” Steve answered, keeping his voice even in hopes of luring the genius to sleep, “I had a nightmare last night was all-”

 

“What!” cried Tony. There went Steve’s plan to keep him calm. The genius propped himself up on his elbows so he was hovering over Steve. The concern in his eyes sent a warm sensation spreading in the super soldier's chest.

 

“Does Bucky know? Why didn’t you come to me? I thought-well- I thought I helped as presumptuous as it sounds.”

 

“You do, doll,” Steve whispered, brushing his finger along Tony’s forehead, tracing the worried lines, “But, I knew you needed your sleep and I didn’t want to wake you for something like this. I’ve already put you through enough, don’t you think?”

It wasn’t the whole truth, but it wasn’t a lie. And, Steve thought it at least earned him a chuckle. But, it only helped in worrying Tony more.

 

Well, shit.

 

“Stop doing that,” Tony said, pushing himself off of Steve completely as he stood from the couch. Steve felt an unpleasant rush of cold air, and mourned the loss of heat.

 

“Stop thinking I don’t want to help you, stop thinking that I don’t care about you Steve Rogers. If you need me you come to me no matter what. I thought you knew by now that-”

Tony cut himself off, his hand flying to his mouth. Steve froze. What just happened? What was just  _ about _ to happen.

 

“I have to go, I have a meeting with Pepper in five minutes and I’m going to be late now. Bye Steve.”

 

“Wait, Tony,” but the man had fled from the room like it was on fire. Steve plopped himself down on the floor, and pulled at his hair until the physical pain overpowered the emotional. He had fucked up bad. He had pushed Tony away. He had pushed him right into Rhodes willing arms no doubt, and that really sucked.

 

Why?

 

Because Steve Rogers could no longer deny he was head over heels in love with Tony Stark.

  
  


~~~~~~~~~~

  
  


Steve didn’t see Tony for the next two days as the man had been flown across the planet to some Stark Industries meeting he had to go to. And Steve had been displeased to find that Rhodes had gone with him.

Bucky asked him multiple times to spar when he noticed his friends sour mood. But, he declined all invitations, trying hard to ignore Natasha’s knowing looks whenever he came across her.

Fine, she had been right about him being in love with Tony, he had accepted that fact. But, now he didn’t know what to do with it. Tony was mad at him. Steve had disappointed the genius and was too afraid to fix his mistakes. He should try to call, or at least text the man. Steve didn’t think Tony would intentionally ignore his attempts to get in touch, but he had been too afraid of rejection to try.

He knew the longer he waited the worse it would be. He was fully aware that the more time that passed since the fight would only serve to cause a rift in his and Tony’s relationship. But, he also couldn’t bare the thought of hearing Tony’s voice and finding out that, one, he was angry with Steve, or two, he was having a great time and had forgotten about Steve completely.

It was enough to keep the super soldier twisting and turning in bed each night, keeping him from getting any sleep. Again. Even Bucky hadn’t been able to help him, no matter how the man had tried.

All Steve wanted to do was go to Tony, and have the man cuddle him to sleep. He could picture it now, as it had happened so many times. He would walk into the room, making sure to be quiet so Tony didn’t wake, and would crawl under the silk sheets. Steve never wanted to be the one to wake the other man, and knew every hour or so Tony would wake up briefly anyway before falling back to sleep. Steve would wait for that moment, relishing in Tony’s even breaths and tiny snores as he slept. And then Tony would eventually wake up. He’d make eye contact with Steve, whose gaze would already be on his, and ask if he wanted to talk about what had kept him up that night. In the beginning Steve had always declined. But, when he found Tony refused to stop asking the question every time the super soldier came to him, he accepted. Not always, sometimes he really did just need to sleep. But, the offer would always be there.

Tonight would be one of those nights where he desperately needed to rest. Tony would lay his head against Steve’s shoulder and say ‘ok’. Then, Steve would burrow himself under the covers, and Tony would wrap himself around the super soldier like an octopus. Steve would shiver once at the body heat, and the two would fall asleep. 

It was exactly what the super soldier needed right now. But, he expected it would be a long while until he got it again.

Sitting up in bed, Steve stretched his arms high above his head and made a vow not to think about Tony for the rest of the morning. Otherwise the longing would kill him.

The super soldier put on a pair of slippers Tony had bought him, and made his way down the hall to the communal kitchen, No, he wouldn’t think anymore on Tony this morning or how he would be enjoying himself across the world right about now. Probably pleasantly tipsy with a girl on his arm, or worse Rhodes on his arm. He wouldn’t bother anymore this fine morning about how, though he didn’t reach out to the genius, the genius hadn’t reached out to him either. By now Tony most likely had someone’s tongue down his throat or was laughing with people much less fucked up then Steve. He could be lounging in the sun with Rhodes or…

 

Steve heard voices. 

 

The super soldier stopped where he was, just hidden from view of anyone on the other side of the wall. He could hear running water, and two pairs of feet shuffling around making breakfast. Steve hadn’t heard either of those footsteps in two days, which could only mean one thing. Tony was home. Therefor, the other pair of feet was Rhodes. Jealousy made Steve’s toes curl. The super soldier plastered himself against the wall, and listened in on what the two where saying.

Some part of him knew this was wrong. A bigger part said listening to how Rhodes treated Tony in private was important insight into what kind of person Rhodes really was.

 

“-What would you say right now?” That was Rhodes voice, but Steve hadn’t caught what the beginning part of the sentence was, being too caught up on his own head. Now, though, he focused in on the conversation heavily. Thankful for his enhanced hearing.

 

“If I could say anything in the world? Without judgment?” Came Tony’s croaky voice, he was probably hungover. At least Steve hoped that’s what it was from.

 

“Right now, Tony. Say it.”

 

Steve waited with bated breath, sensing he had stumbled upon something far more serious then he was expecting. 

He heard Tony set down his glass, and say three words that would change the super soldier’s world forever.

 

“I love you.”

 

Steve froze.

 

“I love you so fucking much it scares the shit out of me,” Tony’s voice went shaky as if all the emotion inside him was bubbling over, “What happens when you realize I’m not everything you think I am? What happens when I fail you and you leave me? I can’t handle that. I’ll break beyond repair, and yet, I still don’t care. Because I would break a thousand times over if it meant I could be with you for one day, for one second. You’re worth everything, and i’m so afraid that you’ll end up thinking I’m not worth anything at all.”

Steve could feel his heart shatter, and a pain he never had felt the likes of before stab him in the chest. Distantly, he knew that Tony and Rhodes were still speaking and that what they had to say might still be important. But, Steve had tuned them out. Shaking like a leaf in the wind, the super soldier brought his hand to his face only to pull back wet finger tips. He was crying.

 

Steve couldn’t remember the last time he had cried. In all his seventy years he was positive it had never happened. Steve took a harsh intake of breath and stumbled backwards, trying to make a quick escape for his bedroom before anyone from the team walked in. No one could see him like this, especially not Tony.

 

_ I love you. _

 

The cursed words bounced in Steve’s head as he fumbled for the door handle to his room. He wanted to scream, he wanted to sob, he never wanted to speak again.

 

_ I love you. _

 

It was his own fault, Steve realized as he slid down the door to the floor of his bedroom. He had been too late, and now he had lost Tony forever.

 

_ I love you. _

 

Steve wiped angrily at his eyes. He didn’t get to mourn when the cause of his anguish was his own fault. He had pushed Tony away and straight into the arms of James Rhodes.

 

_ I love you. _

 

No longer was he allowed to care or protect Tony. That right went to Rhodes. Tony was no longer his. He saw now that maybe the genius never had been to begin with.

 

_ I love you. _

 

Tony may love Rhodes, but there was one thing Steve knew for sure. He would always love Tony more than that man ever could. He wished he was able to say that he was happy for the pair. But, he couldn’t. Not now, maybe not ever. Steve had lost his happiness.

 

But, before Steve could wallow in self pity for the rest of his life.

 

The alarm went off. The call for all Avengers to assemble.

 

The super soldier's head perked up.

 

Something was wrong, really wrong. And part of him was happy for it. At least a fight would get Steve’s mind off of Tony for a while. Right?

 

~~~~~~~~~~

 

Aliens had invaded the city. Or were they robots?

 

Steve thought maybe the technical term was alien robots, but he quickly dismissed it on the grounds that he sounded too much like Clint.

 

_ “ _ Behind you soldier,” came Bucky’s voice through the intercom.

 

He had barely finished the words when Steve spun around just in time to grab one of the creatures by the throat. He squeezed his metal fist until small mechanical mechanisms started sprouting from its neck. The alien clawed desperately at Steve’s metal arm. If it had been his other arm, long painful gashes would have been cutting up his skin by now. As it was, Steve barely noticed. He squeezed harder. The thing gave a final shudder before going limp. He threw the body away and kept fighting.

Maybe he was being more clinical and violent today then normal. Maybe Natasha and Bucky were giving him worried glances in between fighting their own battles. Steve didn’t care. He just wanted to get this over with quickly so he could hide away from the world for a long, long while. Maybe he would just leave all together-

 

“Shit,” Steve cursed. He had lost focus on what was going on around him and hadn’t noticed the being coming at his side until it was too late. The alien had taken a slice out of Steve’s thigh, he could feel the blood starting to flow freely. Sure enough when he brought his hand to the wound it pulled back red. The soldier growled and advanced on the alien. It didn't stand a chance. With one solid punch the thing exploded to pieces.

 

Good, Steve thought to himself.

 

“Steve, Steve are you ok,” came Tony’s concerned voice through the intercom. Steve looked skyward and wasn’t surprised to see a red and gold rocket zooming around. It was unfortunate that War Machine was right next to him. A sour taste filled Steve’s mouth.

 

“Just fine Mr. Stark,” was Steve’s blunt reply.

 

He swore he heard five different intakes of breath through the coms. Even the Hulk looked at him strangely from where he was scaling a building. Not since the first day they met had Steve called Tony by his formal name. And, after learning that the name reminded Tony of his Father he had sworn to never call him it again. But, what was he supposed to say? Tony wasn’t his anymore.

 

Steve grunted as he picked back up where he left off. Fighting crazy robot aliens. Goddammit. 

 

“Steve...is something wrong? Did I do something?” Came Tony’s voice from the sky again, though it came out more strangled as he was in the middle of fighting one of the creatures. Great. They were  _ flying _ robot aliens. Clint was going to have a field day when this was over.

At that moment Steve caught Bucky’s eye. His friend must have seen something desperate in him because he nodded at Steve and spoke into his mic.

“No...no idle chit chat guys come on. We’re almost done. Thor and War Machine come with me. There’s a cluster of these guys to our left.”

Steve shot the man a grateful look before he ran off to save the day. Steve would expect nothing less of him. But, even while in the middle of battle, Tony was stubborn.

 

“No idle chit chat? No idle chit chat! You think this is idle chit chat spangles? That man hasn’t called me Mr. Stark since the first day I met him. Something's fucking wrong, don’t you dare-”

 

Iron Man’s mic cut out.

 

No one spoke, none were sure what had happened.

 

“Tony,” Steve finally said, forgetting to use formalities, “Tony, are you there?”

But, all anyone could hear from the man was static. Shit.

 

The super soldier chanced a glance to the sky in time to see The Iron Man suit crashing to the ground. A pit formed in his stomach.

Steve decapitated the alien he was fighting, and made to save Tony. But, he forced himself to halt. It wasn’t his responsibility anymore. It was Rhodes.

Rhodes would come to save Tony, and everything would be fine. If Rhodes cared for Tony a fraction of what Steve himself felt for the man, Tony was in no danger. But, Tony kept falling with no War Machine in sight.

 

“Rhodes,” Steve growled into the mic, but the man was too busy fighting to respond.

 

“Tony’s falling,” the super soldier said, panic clear in his voice. But, still Rhodes didn’t answer.

 

“War Machine he’s crashing do something,” Steve roared, his heart in his throat. Finally, Rhodes answer.

 

“I’m a little busy here. You do something!”

The pent up energy that was building in Steve’s legs burst through as he started sprinting to Tony’s landing point. All he felt was fear induced adrenaline. He barely noticed the blood from his thigh wound, he barely even registered how livid he was at Rhodes for abandoning Tony. All he knew was if he didn’t make it to Tony in time the man was going to die, and Steve couldn’t live in a world without Tony Stark. Whether the man was his or not.

“TONY,” Steve frantically shouted, extending his arms just in time to catch the suit falling from the sky. The force was enough to knock Steve to his knees, he didn’t envy the bruises he’d have tomorrow. Now was it the time to care. All that mattered was the man in his arms was safe now.

The super soldier clutched tightly to the suit, ignoring the heat emulating from it that was blistering his hands. He wasn’t registering pain, only the fear that was fueling him.

“Damn you Stark. You’re lucky my age and cardiovascular system don’t correlate, because you would have just given me a heart attack.”

The super soldier waited for the tell tale signs of Tony’s well being. Aka a sarcastic voice telling him he used the words ‘cardiovascular system’ wrong. When none came, Steve’s heart did in fact pick up its pace.

 

“Tony, I’m here open the helmet,” Steve said, losing all traces of humor. He expected the plate to slide up easily enough to reveal a smug smile at getting the super soldier to call him by his real name. But, the helmet stayed close. Steve bit his tongue.

 

“Please sweetheart, kitten, doll open the damn helmet,” Steve said it harsher this time, demanding Tony show himself. This wasn’t funny.

 

“Tony…” but there was no response.

 

For the second time that day, tears started to blind Steve. But, this time there was no hope at keeping them back. Like a damn had shattered inside him, Steve sobbed pathetically over Tony’s unmoving body. Every emotion he had tried to keep bottled up for days now consumed him all at once. And, there was so much.

 

“Get up, Tony. I can’t do this without you. I love you and I know you’ll never love me back and I don’t care. Just don’t die on me.”

 

The super soldier desperately tried to pry open the helmet with his own fingers. But, it was still too hot. He could only touch it for a little while before the pain overwhelmed him.

 

“Move,” he heard his own, broken voice scream over and over again, “please, move.”

 

Distantly, he saw news camera’s on him, recording his reaction to Tony’s unending silence for the world to see. But, he didn’t care. They could gawk at how the deadliest man in the world wept over a billionaires metal suit all they wanted to. If Tony was gone nothing would matter anymore.

 

“Steve, you have to get up,” came Bucky’s gentle voice from his shoulder. A pair of arms wrapped around him, and hauled him to his feet. How much time had gone by since he initially caught Tony, he didn’t know. But, it seemed the battle had come to a stand still around him. The remaining aliens seemed to vanish from the ground. As if they had never been there there to begin with. But, they had been there. They had left the destruction that now lay in his hands.

 

“No,” Steve protested, aiming the response at Bucky. But, Cap wasn’t taking no for an answer. A pair of arms wrapped around him and pulled him off the ground. Steve wanted to fight it, but was too mentally and physically drained to do anything.

 

“I can’t leave him,” Steve insisted, trying to pull away from his friend when he saw SHIELD medics rush around the suit. A helicopter rang out above them and sent down cables to attach to Tony. 

 

“No, please.”

 

But, it was too late. Iron man was already being flown away in an emergency helicopter.

 

Bucky’s arms were still firm around him.

 

“They’re taking him to the hospital Steve. The suit became so hot it melted onto Tony’s skin, and Jarvis’s system was blown out completely. Tony’s personal medical team will be on the case. The bastard will be up and about in no time, you’ll see.”

Steve knew Bucky was just trying to make him feel better. But, for all they knew Tony was already...dead inside the metal coffin of his. Steve shivered and pushed the thought from his mind.

 

“I have to go be with him,” Steve said, though he was still leaning heavily on Bucky for support. 

The super soldier turned in Bucky’s arms to face the team. Nat, Clint, Thor, and The Hulk. They all had looks of defeat on their faces. Steve hated it. They acted like Tony was already dead.

 

“And we will go see him, Steve I promise. But, first you need medical attention-”

Steve barely heard the rest of Bucky’s sentence when he spotted another standing in the background. A man that made his blood boil. The man who was the cause of all this suffering. Steve’s strength immediately returned to him in full force. He pushed his way out of Bucky’s arms and made a direct path for James Rhodes.

 

“You,” he growled, fire in his veins. Before Rhodes could protect himself Steve picked the man up and threw him at the nearest building. The only thing that saved him was the suit. The suit Tony had made for the bastard who killed him.

 

“What the hell,” Rhodes coughed out, as he stood up on shaky legs while concrete rained down around him.

 

“Steve stop it!” shouted Natasha but Steve wasn’t listening. Not when the need for revenge was roaring inside him.

 

“You were supposed to protect him!” Steve screamed. In two long strides he was right in Rhodes face and aimed a punch at the man’s head hoping it would fall from his shoulders. But, just in time Rhodes pulled his mask down and flew over Steve to behind where he aimed a laser beam. The super soilder ducked just in time to avoid having a hole in his skull. Steve lashed out. He grabbed the arm Rhodes had used to shoot at him and, with his own metal hand, crushed it like tinfoil until the Lieutenant inside screamed out in pain. 

A bigger, green fist wrapped around Steve’s body entirely and lifted him off the ground. Until no matter how he squirmed, Steve was stuck in the giant’s hand.

 

“No hurt Tin Man,” said Hulk.

 

“Let go of me,” the super soldier ordered, not caring for what Banner had to say. 

 

Rhodes flew up in War Machine until he was face to face with Steve. He put the visor of his helmet up, knowing the soldier wasn’t a present threat. Still, Steve felt a sense of satisfaction at seeing the man cradle his shattered hand.

 

“What the hell is wrong with you,” Rhodes bellowed.

 

“You let him fall,” Steve seethed still trying to fight the Hulk’s hold, though it was no use, “He trusted you, he loved you and you let him fall. It wasn’t my job anymore to protect him. He chose you and now he’s-”

Steve couldn’t say the word out loud. He screamed, his anguish too much to hold inside anymore.

 

“You’re crazy. What are you talking about he chose me? I’m his best friend sure, but there’s room for both of us Rogers. Well, maybe not now. After this I’m taking my word of approval back.”

 

Steve stopped moving for a moment, looking at Rhodes with pure hatred.

 

_ “ _ Enough with the lies, Rhodes. I heard you two in the kitchen this morning. He declared his love for you, and you betrayed him,” Steve insisted, confused himself now. 

Feeling that Steve was pliant enough to be let down, the Hulk lowered the man back to surface level. Rhodes descended as well. The familiar whir of his suit an odd comfort to Steve.

As soon as the super soldier’s feet touched the ground he started to wobble, his injuries finally catching up to him. Lucky for him, Bucky grabbed him before his face met the pavement.

 

“You misunderstood,” Rhodes said with a sigh, and shook his head, “Tony’s going to kill me for this,” he mumbled to himself before focusing back on Steve.

 

“Tony Stark is head over heels, truly, madly, crazy in love with you, Steve Rogers.”

 

Steve’s knees gave out on him again and poor Bucky had to use even more of his strength to hold him up. The super soldier felt as if he had been struck by a physical blow, and couldn’t bring himself to interrupt the man in front of him.

 

“That’s the reason Tony invited me to the tower this week. He wanted me to make sure he wasn’t manipulating you into liking him, the crazy bastard. He isn’t that charming. But, he was convinced he was just projecting his feelings onto you. And let me just say. It took me all of five minutes to know how wrong he was. You were just as crazy for him as he was for you. In fact I don’t think i’ve ever met two people more codependent on each other. When I told him so, he didn’t know what to do. He’s been hurt by so many people Rogers. He was afraid. So this morning, I was sick of him moping around. I told him to pretend I was you and practice telling his feelings to me. That’s what you heard. Everything he said was meant for you, not me. He loves you.”

 

Steve was silent. The rest of the team stood around him, waiting for him to say something in return. Like maybe an apology. But, Rhodes was going to have to wait for that one.

Steve’s eyes closed against his will, and the world faded to black.

  
  


~~~~~~~~~~

  
  


Steve awoke to an incessant beeping in his ear. The man rolled to his side, fumbling for the alarm he didn’t remember setting the night previous. It didn’t make sense that he had, seeing as he had been sleeping so poorly to begin with. But, he was sure it was important. After groping around blindly for a minute he began to think otherwise.

A dull ache throbbed throughout his entire body and every time he moved his arm something tugged uncomfortably at his elbow. And, as weird as it sounded his room smelled weird. Like it had been sterilized...hospital.

Steve’s eyes snapped open, or they tried to. In reality it was more like he sluggishly blinked them open, probably looking close to a sloth. Damn, they had him on intense drugs, especially if he only just realized where he was. As he said, the hospital.

He recalled the battle the Avengers had just gone through. The flying robot aliens intent on taking over the world. It hadn’t gone well for the creatures. Not that Steve had gotten out unscathed. Focusing all his concentration on his limbs he moved his hands to feel over the wound on his leg. It was bandaged heavily, and underneath he could feel stitching. He would live.

 

But, Tony might not.

 

The air was punched out of Steve’s lungs as the memories came flooding in. Tony’s fall, his crash to the ground. Finding out the man was in love with him a second to late.

Steve wheezed heavily feeling his heart rate spike. Before he knew it three nurses rushed into the room. One of them tried to administer oxygen, but Steve pushed it away. Give it to Tony, he wanted to say, he’s the one who needs it more.

 

But, all that came out was a wheezy, “Tony…”

 

Another nurse ran her hand through his hair soothingly, trying to calm down his racing pulse.

 

“Don’t try to speak Mr. Rogers, save your breath. We’re going to put you back under before your pain levels get too high again.”

Mr. Rogers, Steve almost laughed. He had lost the right to that name long ago. But, the rest of her sentence was truly what lingered in Steve’s mind.

 

“No..No, not yet,” he said putting his arms out to stop them, “Where’s Tony?” He asked before going into a coughing fit due to his dry throat. How long had he been asleep for?

 

“Tony. You mean Mr. Stark?” the nurse asked.

Steve nodded frantically, was the woman stupid. What other Tony had fallen from the sky in the past few hours?

 

“He’s right there, Mr. Rogers. Just turn your head.”

Steve’s breath caught. He was terrified of what he might find if he in fact turned to look to his left. What if there was a tube stuck down Stark’s throat? What if his entire body was in casts? The super soldier knew that not knowing would be the so much worse than knowing.

Steve glanced over to his side, and felt like he could breath for the first time since that morning.

There lay Tony Stark. His mouth splayed open for drool to drip out, and his hair sticking up in the most awkward of ways. It was the most content Steve could ever remember seeing him.

 

“Thank god,” Steve exhaled, so relieved he could, for the third time in however many days, cry. Thank god Tony Stark was alive. Thank God.

 

That was the last thought Steve had before sleep pulled him back under.

 

~~~~~~~~~

 

The second time Steve woke up, everything was much clearer. The sound of rain pitter pattered on the window to the hospital room, and no longer were the walls around him fuzzy. Maybe most importantly, he could hear not one but two heart monitors beeping instead of just one.

As quickly as his dulled reflexes could go, Steve propped himself up to look over at Tony’s bed. Only to find the genius asleep, but another man sitting at his side.

 

“James,” Steve said, oddly surprised. But, it made sense that the man was here. He would want to check up on his lover. Except, that was wrong. They weren’t together. Even Steve’s muddled brain could remember the relief that flooded through him when he found that out. 

The man in question looked up from where he was reading a magazine. He looked well if you didn’t count the sling encasing one of his arms. Steve had the presence of mind to feel guilty for that.

 

“That’s the first time you’ve ever called me that,” Rhodes said, a humorous smile gracing his lips.

Steve immediacy tensed up.

 

“If you don’t like it, it would not be a hardship to go back to just Rhodes,” he grunted, all of a sudden feeling incredibly self conscious that he was the only one of the two in a hospital bed wearing a paper dress.

 

“No, no, don’t misunderstand. Call me James, please. You know, I always envisioned us being friends. Taking care of Tony together, even if we cared in different ways. Actually I was hoping we could start over. Have an actual adult conversation without any testosterone driven posturing as Tony would call it,” James laughed at his own words, but Steve wasn’t offended. It was clear that Rhodes was incriminating himself as well. So no Steve wasn’t offended, caught off guard was more like it.

 

“You want to be friends,” Steve said, “With me?”

 

He waited for the other shoe to fall, for Rhodes to start laughing at his own joke. But, when the man only nodded, Steve didn’t know what to think.

 

“But, I shattered your arm, I threw you against a building,” Steve insisted.

 

“Yes you did. Thanks for that by the way. Truly I can’t wait for the grueling hours of physical therapy to begin,” James said sarcastically, but Steve flinched. Attacking Rhodes was something Steve would have done in his Winter Soldier days. He truly wasn’t proud of it.

 

“Will you heal,” Steve was almost afraid of the answer. James’s eyes softened, clearly hearing the guilt in the super soldier’s voice.

 

“I’ll be just fine.”

 

James smiled at him. And Steve didn’t find it a hardship to smile back. They were working their way to a tentative friendship, and Steve was curious to see where it would lead them.

 

“How is he?” Steve dared to ask, motioning to Tony. He felt sick to his stomach, afraid of what exactly the answer would bring.

 

“Alive thanks to a certain super soldier,” James said, “He’s burned from the suit and mildly concussed, but he’ll be fine. Truly, thank you Steve. He’s like a brother to me, I don’t know what I’d do without him.”

Rhodes gave Tony a meaningful look, as if he could hear him. For once, the lump in Steve’s throat wasn’t present. He finally realized the brotherly love shared between the two was exactly that, brotherly. It also helped that the super soldier knew Tony would be ok.

 

“How long have we been out?” Was Steve’s next question, steering the conversation to that of something lighter.

 

“Three days each,” James said, standing from his chair to grab his bag from the floor.

 

“Impossible,” Steve said mostly to himself, “No drug has ever been enough to keep me asleep that long before.”

 

“Oh, that was Tony,” Rhodes answered, while reaching for the coffee on Tony’s nightstand. He seemed to whisper something to the sleeping genius that Steve didn’t catch. But, the thought left his mind quickly as James turned his attention back to Steve.

 

“Tony invented it a while back in case you or Bucky were ever seriously injured, this would keep you down long enough to heal.” Steve didn’t think it was possible for his heart to swell with affection anymore then it had when it came to the genius. But, like with most things, Tony proved him wrong.

 

“Now,” Rhodes said as he made his way to the exit of the hospital room, “I did not bribe the nurses to put you two in the same room for you not to talk. So Tony, stop pretending you’re asleep. And, Steve it’s nice to finally meet your acquaintance now that you don’t hate me. We should hang out.”

 

Steve’s eyes were wide from the bluntness of the entire situation.

 

“Bye now,” James said with a smirk as he closed the hospital room door behind him.

 

The door had only just closed in time for Rhodes to dodge the pillow that went flying his way. The man’s laughter could be heard all the way down the hallway.

 

“Bastard,” mumbled a voice from Steve’s left.

 

The super soldier gasped.

 

Steve felt like he was free falling, crashing down at the last possible second before he would be whisked away. He had thought he would never hear that voice again. He had thought the last words the two of them would ever speak to each other were going to be filled with regret. He had thought he had lost the best thing in his life.

 

Steve put his head in his hands, and squeezed his eyes closed. God Dammit he would not cry again, he would not!

 

“Steve? Hey big guy, what’s wrong?” Tony asked, concerned at the sudden change in the super soldier.

That made everything so much worse.

 

“You idiot. You’re alive,” came Steve’s muffled voice. The raw emotion touching both men deeply.

 

“Ok, ok we’re going to fix this right now, all right,” before Steve could stop him Tony grabbed the crutches leaning against his bed and hobbled his way over to Steve’s side of the room.

 

“Damnit Tony be careful,” Steve snapped at him, grabbing at the man to support him before he collapsed onto the floor. Just from that little exertion, Tony was shaking. He was not yet strong enough to support his body weight.

There were bandages wrapped around Tony’s legs, feet, and forearms that Steve hadn’t noticed before due to the covers that hid them. The super soldier shuddered knowing severe burns were what lay beneath the gauze. Another ache cut through Steve, it seemed to be coming in waves.

Making sure not to hurt him anymore then he was, Steve pulled Tony onto his lap and buried his face in the man’s shoulder. The crutches collapsed to the floor.

Steve’s arms wrapped protectively around the smaller man, who buried himself into Steve’s chest. They both gripped each other tightly to him in an effort to never let go. 

 

“Steve, I have to tell you something. It’s something I can’t hold back anymore. And just know I’m sorry. Know I never meant for this to happen, but now that it has I can’t stop it. It’s been eating away at me every day I let go by without telling you. Just don’t hate me, please. I couldn’t bare it.”

 

Steve cut the man off, running his metal hand through the other’s hair in an attempt to get him to look up. Tony complied, blatant fear written in every line of his face.

 

“Is it true? Do you love me?” Steve felt butterflies in his stomach, even though he was fairly positive of the answer. 

 

“Yes.”

 

That’s all the confirmation Steve needed. Without wasting another second he crashed their lips together with a desperate hunger. How many times had he dreamed of this exact moment. How many times had he woken up to Tony’s taste on his tongue, only to realize it had been a moment created by his own imagination. Well, he wasn’t asleep, not this time. Kissing Tony in real life was better then any fantasy he had ever had, and he found he was addicted to it. They only pulled away from each other for brief intervals of breath. Each time a slew of words would escape Tony’s mouth.

 

“It felt like I was going crazy.”

 

Their lips met again.

 

“Thought you would grow to hate me if you ever found out.”

 

Steve cut him off with his mouth.

 

“Never thought I could have this. Never thought I would ever be this happy. I love you Steve Rogers, flaws and all.”

 

Steve forcefully pulled back, “Say it again,” he whispered against the man’s mouth, “Please doll, say it again.”

 

“I love you,” Steve shivered, knowing he would never get tired of hearing those words, “I love you so much and it terrifies me. I love you so much I’ll live through that terror every day if it means I get to have you.”

 

Steve surged into kiss Tony again, not able to hold himself back. Not wanting to.

 

“I love you, too,” he said to the genius, who released all the tension in his body at the words. It seemed Steve wasn’t the only one who needed the reassurance.

The super soldier cupped Tony’s chin with his hands, forcing the man to make eye contact. The genius’s eyes were wet, just as the super soldiers had been as well.

 

“I love you so much Tony Stark,” he said, needing the man to realize just how serious he was, “You almost died three days ago, and it was the scariest moments of my life. I almost lost you and you would have never known I loved you. That terrifies me. You are my world, and I’m so sorry it took all this for me to finally admit. Please...be mine.”

 

_ Be mine before another Rhodes comes along and tries to take you away again. Be mine before the day comes where you leave this earth, and me behind. Be mine so the pure joy I feel now never leaves me, even through our ups and downs. _

 

Those were the silent words Steve didn’t speak, but was almost positive Tony understood anyway.

 

“Be mine,” Steve said again. Pleading with Tony to give him this one thing.

 

“Of course you big oaf. Of course I’ll be yours,” Tony told him before pressing his lips softly against the super soldier's, “I always was.”

Steve’s heart throbbed with the overwhelming love he had for the man, and knew they would be ok. Whatever life threw their way wouldn’t matter because they had each other. And isn’t that all that really mattered?

 

~~~~~~~~~~

 

_ So now you’ve reached the end and are thinking, ‘Really Steve do you really hate Rhodes. After all he did to get you and Tony together?’ _

 

_ The answer is still yes. Because as soon as anything interesting was about to happen on that dreary afternoon the man in question walked into the room with a donut in hand and the rest of the Avenger’s behind him. All of whom had their phones out recording the interaction. _

 

_ “My god,” James shouted, a shiteating grin spliting his face , “I told you to talk, not get naked in a hospital bed. Especially with that leg of your’s Steve.” _

 

_ Steve would have ignored them all if it wasn’t for Tony’s sudden yelp of, “You’re hurt and you didn’t tell me? We have talked about this Steve!” For which the genius proceeded to lecture the super soldier and the super soldier had to sit through it all with an awkward boner poking through the thin covers. _

 

_ So yeah Steve hated James Rhodes. And the rest of The Avengers, and the nurses who came in to see why the heart monitors were going crazy again. And Tony for- _

 

_ Well, maybe not Tony, but definitely Rhodes. _

 

_ One hundred percent Rhodes. _

 

_ Someone needed to remind Steve to give that man a gift basket. _

**Author's Note:**

> If there are any wintersoldier Steve prompts you are interested in seeing written leave a comment (only stony as the pairing tho)  
> Thank you fir reading hope you enjoyed  
> All the love


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